Decided to do an update from the car since I've got some time to kill. Being a mother of two has been so different from the way I thought it would be. In a lot of ways it's like the job I had in the call center. Really busy one minute and really boring the next. My kids are amazing and awful. Sometimes at the same time. I don't really have anything new to say about that. Potty training, bedtime, messes, tantrums, trips to the store (or anywhere for that matter), learning to share, learning not to be a bully, naps, lack of naps, teething, inappropriate silly time, wondering how your child can still be alive when they never eat, learning to fail gracefully (me and them), dealing with change, screen time, snuggles, and your oldest calling you mom instead of mommy and not wanting kisses every time you see them. If you're reading this you've likely read or experienced everything there is to say about all of that.
I find it amazing and amazingly frustrating how different just two people can be from each other. I guess you could say we are all learning life lessons right now, which is a good thing. I'm glad that I'm not too proud to learn something from my kids every once in a while and that I'm able to show them that they don't have to get everything right right now because there is room to grow for our entire lives. Having kids has given me great insight into how our Heavenly Father must feel about all of us and how unbound life is. We have our entire lives to learn. All of our lives to shrink and grow, usually a lot of both. I listened to a book called Unf*ck Your Habitat and it says the great thing about housework is that there's no end. There's no point at which it's over and you can judge your past work and say, "I failed," because it keeps going there's always a chance to do it again, do it better, or just try it a different way. This is a lot like our mortal lives. In this life there is no moment of judgment we can't come back from, there is no point of no return. I've found new meaning in the phrase, "we are all children in God's eyes," I understand better how He is so willing to forgive and help us improve because I have those same desires for my own children. I understand better why families are so important to God's plan because having children has taught me a lot about what I mean to Him.
Having a second kid was scary. I now knew there were so many things that could go wrong. But I have been so blessed in the last two years I don't really know where to start. My husband gave me the courage to look around and find an OB/GYN that I felt comfortable with. Who listened to my story and had the knowledge and confidence to basically say, "let me take it from here." He eased my fears and gave me knowledge. He never just did things to me, he always explained what he wanted to do and asked for permission. He guided me through the rest of the pregnancy and with his team the delivery as well. My little boy was born with no difficulties after almost 48 hours of induced labor. He was born scared and worried about everything but I gave him lots of snuggles and loving words whenever I could and eventually he relaxed a lot and now smiles and laughs often. He grows more confident all the time but he does still scare easily. Hopefully soon we will be able to add some pets to our little family .
